I am doing better now. I'm not sure why I have just felt very odd in this week. I think it might be a culmination of feelings. Thanks for your words of support and encouragement though. I really need it. I was talking to Hna Captain about how I was feeling, and she told me about how we sometimes give ourselves a lot of high expectations, especially about how RMs should be. And then sometimes we get too worried that we aren't what we expected, but if we've done our best, we're who the Lord needs us to be. She asked me if I felt like my best had improved since I came on the mission-and it definitely has. Just remember the girl that went into the MTC, and then went to Monsefu, I gave my best, but since then my best has gotten better. And I suppose it will always be that way, won't it.
It sounds like you all have a busy life going on up there. I guess soon I will be joining you again, won't I? I've been thinking about what I was gonna do all week. I was really blessed to have a companion in my same major, at the same university, at the time I needed to make this decision, because I was able to talk it over with her, and she encouraged me to just do the first option. So I guess I'll be going to school for...well, for a long time. I don't know how I'm gonna do it, but that's what I said when I made the decision to go on a mission too. I guess it just comes down to trusting in the Lord. I didn't really feel like I should choose one over the other, (although I did pray about it), so I figured to just choose one. And I think I definitely picked the hardest one with the biggest workload, but I guess if I can be a missionary, I can do that too, right? It was cool though because as I was thinking about it, I thought "well, to take 18 credits in fall, and to work (hopefully) 20 hours a week, plus have a calling...I'll have to plan my time REALLY well..." and then I remembered "Oh yeah! I'm a missionary! I know how to plan my days really well now!" (not that I didn't before, I've just become a pro on my mission!) And I started to realize how the skills I've gained on my mission are going to help me afterwards. I'm sure this is only the beginning too.
Well, in missionary news this week, we're still working with a family that was a referral from a member. They came to church for the second time yesterday. They're understand things really well, and progressing really well too. They have a baptismal date for April 7, so hopefully we can help them get ready for that. Actually, hopefully they can get an answer and recognize their answer before then. We're also still working with Pantera, (or Panther, in English). His uncle is the stake patriarch and yesterday he came to speak in our ward (Pantera came to church). His uncle told him that he was just waiting for his nephew to tell him when he was going to baptize him. Pantera says he'll be baptized...someday. He just hasn't told us when though. But I think it will be sooner rather than later. It is cool though to teach these people, to feel the spirit working through you to touch the lives of others. To have a random scripture pop into your head, and not remember exactly what it says, but then to share it anyways and to feel it was just what that person needed...wonderful!
How is Marchelle doing? I hope she's doing better. The Priesthood is such a wonderful blessing. I'm so glad to have grown up with the Priesthood in my home, for such an awesome dad who honored his priesthood. It's just amazing, and I love being able to share my testimony of the priesthood with people here-especially the less-active members. Priesthood blessings are powerful, even though the words might not be anything spectacular, the power that we get from them is amazing.
Well, during this week then I'll get my last companion, and hopefully you guys should be getting my itinerary soon. Whenever the office sends it to you. But I'm sure it's all bought and everything. Mom, if you wanna try to get me registered for summer classes you can, or if something happens and you can't, I'll see about what I can do next monday. But if you can do it, do it. And see if you can talk to the el ed dept and see what classes I'll need to sign up for for fall. Oh! And tell Erin and Ilarene that I had the idea that Ilarene should just move into Erin's old apartment a long time ago, and that I love that even though we're a bajillion miles apart, they can still read my mind, and I'm excited because that means I won't have to redecorate the baby's room (that is, unless Ilarene doesn't like it, in which case I will still help her out!).
Well, the computer is telling me that I only have 2 minutes left. Thank you though for being amazing, for loving me, and for supporting me. I know I've told you before but it really means so much to me to have such an awesome family and to have such awesome friends. Keep on being amazing, oh! And get ready for Gen Conference! It's the best!
I love you!